My beautiful Beagle Ruby was PTS on Tuesday morning after suffering multiple seizures for 13 hours. It was the most distressing thing I've ever witnessed, seeing her suffering so much and not being able to do anything but try to comfort her.
The whole experience has left me traumatised. I keep going over and over whether I should have driven to Blackburn ( the only emergency vet I could get to see her) with her fitting, not knowing where I was going, not used to night time motorway driving, stressed out and having to leave a poorly husband for goodness knows how long. Seeing her little confused face every time she came round, each time more damage done to her, and by the time I got her to the vets in the morning, she was semi conscious.
Her little whimper will stay with me for a long, long time. She was still fitting when Mario carried her into the surgery. They took her straight off him and into one of the rooms. We sat waiting for 45 minutes before I was called in. They'd given her Phenobarbitone so she was no longer fitting and was very calm and so sleepy. That is the sight I want to remember. Whatever caused the seizures was Neurological. She'd suffered for 4 years with problems with her back and hind legs. The vet told me she'd suffered a lot of damage and I asked her what she would do if she was her dog. She told me the kindest thing would be to let her go, so I made the decision and signed her life away. I'm utterly heartbroken for my sweet, naughty, destructive but so loved little girl. My RubyRoo.
A little bit about how she came into my life.
Aniello has never wanted a dog. He likes them well enough, as long as they're other people's. We have lots of pets in the family. Almost every family home we visit has a cat or dog/s. I always wanted a dog, but knew I would never have one with him feeling the way he did.
We have a beautiful willow tree in the garden and he wanted to cut it right back. It became a standing joke that if he ever touched that tree I would get a dog. My Mum used to tease him, telling him there was an old saying in Wales - where she was born - that if you cut a willow tree down a hairy hand would come and get you in the night. Whether this was a true saying or she just made it up, I have no idea, but it seemed to work for a few years, until one day Aniello got so fed up that he asked Mario and his nephew to chop the branches. They hacked away at it for a few hours, whilst I was getting angrier and angrier! By the time they'd finished it looked nothing like the beautiful tree that it had. At the time I didn't know that it would grow back more beautiful than ever!
The following morning, when I looked out of the window and saw the tree, something snapped in me and I put a status on Facebook (only half joking) asking if anyone knew of any rescue or re-home dogs. My very oldest friend from way back messaged me, and said she had a pretty little 9 month old Beagle called Molly that she was thinking of re-homing. She wanted her to go to someone she knew would look after her well. It seemed like an Omen to me, because only the day before, my son had told me he'd like to get a Beagle after his ex partner had taken their dog.
Anyway the next day Mario and I went to visit my friend to see Molly and she was the prettiest, nuttiest little dog I'd ever seen. We took her for a little walk in Stanley Park and she was so friendly to everyone she met. I decided there and then that I had to have her. We were going away on holiday so had to wait until we came home to pick her up. In May 2015 Molly became Ruby for two reasons. One because I'd heard that it's a good idea to give a re-home a new name ( they soon become used to it) and two because it was our Ruby wedding anniversary that year.
When we finally got her home, I truly thought I'd made a huge mistake. She was jumping on all the furniture, up and down the stairs and chewed my £100 prescription sunglasses to bits! Aniello was out of his mind but I'd commited to her and had to see it through. She was a typical Beagle. Naughty, full of energy, destructive and disruptive. She was also the most friendly, loving and beautiful little girl. I took her to training class and she was the most naughty dog there. It helped enormously though, and she did seem to calm down a lot once she was out of her puppy phase.
She used to love going on the big Gala field running around with other dogs, and for a Beagle her recall was brilliant. I took her to the beach where she loved to go for a paddle in the sea. Stanley Park was a big favourite too. Every time I took her out someone would remark about how she walked. She truly had the gait of a dressage horse. Infact one man actually asked me what was wrong with her because of the way she walked. I was so angry I told him in no uncertain terms that there was nothing wrong with her the rude man.
In hindsight though it could be that the problems with her back and legs were already there waiting to manifest themselves. She had to have operations on both cruciate ligaments in her hind legs and that was the beginning of her decline. The past few years saw her in more and more pain after her walks. If she ran she would be in such severe pain afterwards that I had to stop taking her on the beach and field. She started to growl defensively at other dogs, so I could never let her off her lead anymore and used to cross the road rather than chance her maybe snapping at another dog if she felt threatened by it. I know it was only the fight or flight mechanism in her that caused her to be like that. She was still great with any dog that she got to know and was absolutely wonderful with Nino.
For a long time, before her back and legs prevented her from even getting up the stairs, let alone jumping onto the furniture, Ruby used to sit across the top of my chair and watch the world go by through the window. As time passed though, she couldn't jump up so she spent her days in the porch on the lookout for any dog and their owners walking by. She'd have a bark at every single one of them, and some people would stop just to let their dogs have a bark back at her. I'm wondering what all the people who pass by our house now with their dogs are thinking. Also our poor traumatised postman must be wondering why it's so quiet now when he posts the letters through. We even had to have a wire basket attached because if Ruby got to them first they'd be ripped to shreds!
I can't say Aniello ever truly accepted her, and is probably enjoying the peace now, but I know he misses her a little bit. He even shed a tear for her when he saw her fitting. He would rarely stroke her but fed her every morning. Always told me when her food was running low and bought her treats now and then. Paid for her to be groomed and washed her bed. Always wanted the lead when we were on walks. Little things that showed he did care about her.
♥ My darling girl RubyRoo. The house is so quiet without you. I'll miss you forever, and I pray that if there is a Heaven, you're right there with Nana waiting for me to join you one day ♥
Run free baby girl ♥
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